That's when I had trouble "thinking". Apparently I can search and pray, I am just incapable of pondering. One of the side effects of both my disease AND my medication is the inability to concentrate. I cant' finish sentences, I can't articulate my thoughts well, and I can't ponder the meaning of the scriptures as they apply to me personally. That is unbelievably frustrating for me. I've been reading in the Book of Mormon every single day and I can't even remember what I'm reading about. I'm also still pretty incapable of feeling the spirit, I didn't even feel it at my sons baptism. So if I can't feel the spirit, and I can't ponder on the scriptures, then what's the point of it all?
That's what I "pondered" on tonight. Yippee.
On a lighter note, this is what I found when I went to tuck in Grace tonight. She couldn't decide which animal to sleep with so she lined them all up to share the bed with her.
1 comment:
Hang in there sweetie! One thing about BP; we are on a rollercoaster whether we want to be or not. I have all the same issues with my memory and can't finish my sentences also. It's very frustrating when you can't speak what is in your mind and you stammer around trying to find the right word. You know the word, but you can't remember it. So frustrating. I hope in a few days you'll be able to ponder a bit more. I said a few days, because with this stuff it doesn't happen overnight. Hugs to you!!!
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