Yes, it's 5:00 in the morning and I haven't been asleep yet. Not for the lack of trying, but it seems like the harder you try to fall asleep to more difficult it becomes. To sleep you can't really concentrate on anything, so it's counter-productive. Any-hoo, here I am again. Awake. All-nighter. I'm too old for this.
As I have previously documented, I make lists when I can't sleep. Today (tonight?) I made a list about motherhood, about some absolutes that will happen in every home that has children. They are universal truths that I have experienced first hand.
Whenever I lift the toilet seat I will always find a surprise inside.
Whenever I cook a meal, someone will ALWAYS be hungry.
No matter how many loads of laundry you do, there are at least two more complete loads waiting for you under the bed, behind the dresser, under the couch, and on the bathroom floor. Let alone the clothes on their back.
Kids don't know how to clean. They ask for your help, and then they sit and watch you do all the work.
Modesty is a myth perpetuated by children's clothing manufacturers. My kids would rather be naked.
No matter how many crunches I do, my babies have ruined my waistline forever.
Kids want to be grown up enough for privileges, but are childlike enough to be incapable of deserving them.
It's scary to let them ride their bike down the street to a friend's house.
Blood coming from me is no big deal; blood coming from my child is scary.
One more story is never enough... after "the end" they will always want just one more.
Sometimes the big yellow bus looks like a tin can that you are entrusting your children into traffic with.
Sometimes kids are so honest they make you cry.
Working moms will NEVER have a clean house. Ever. Let it go.
Hearing a child pray for you is one of the Lord's tender mercies.
Yogurt on the dog is the least of your problems.
"I was just trying to figure out..." is the answer to every question you ask. A question you shouldn't have asked, because there was never going to be a good answer.
Moms can't take naps. I've tried, disaster always strikes. One child was green once when I woke up. Don't ask.
"You're the best mommy I ever had" is the sweetest thing anyone has ever said to me.
Being a mother is the best thing I've ever done. (besides marrying you, Babe... without you the kids weren't even possible :)
4 comments:
Wow, how do you get SO profound in the middle of the night. Perhaps you were cut out for the night shift? By the looks of this list, you could handle any crisis at 4am.
I, too, have had many sleepless nights! I hope after creating your list you were able to get some sleep!
Man -- night time is when I get all my best stuff. I guess that's what being creative does to you! ;)
Next time I am up, I will have to check FB earlier. I am sure the two of us together could make the ultimate list EVER!
BTW, very curious about the green child. Sounds painfully like our house.
I have been a stay at home mom for over 8 years. We never have clean houses either. I guess it's because I don't have an extra house and just have to live in the one that I just cleaned up. The only time it comes close to being clean is when I am pregnant and nesting. So twice in the last eight years. WooHoo!
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