I am a nice person.

I am a nice person.


I let the car with the blinker on go in front of me in traffic.

I let people go ahead of me in the grocery store, the guy with fewer things, or the Mom with a screaming baby that just wants to go home.


I am quick to offer compliments on someone’s new outfit, hairstyle, beautiful babies or talented kids, a craft project, anything someone might be proud of.

I carry thank you cards in my purse and leave them under the windshield wipers of vehicles carrying a Veteran’s license plate.

And of course as a Mom, I do my best to love and serve my family every day.

I am a NICE person.


Some people aren’t nice, like the guy who honked and flipped me off in traffic today. Maybe he’s nice sometimes, but not today. He was a stranger, and I didn’t take it personally. I didn’t do anything wrong, and he was probably just having a bad day. I can handle that sort of unkindness. It’s generic.


The kind I CAN’T handle, and the kind that I’ve been the victim of lately, is when it is personal.

The kind that doesn’t come from a stranger, it comes directly from someone I know, and someone who knows me.

When it’s someone from the neighborhood / church that critiques my mothering skills, and the observations aren’t good. They’re downright mean.

When I’m called names that I don’t deserve.


Then, a stranger swears at me in church during a baby blessing and calls me a mean mother.


Another stranger yells at me for parking in the wrong place, which I chose because it was shady. Someone parks there every day, but no one complained until it was me that parked there. She knocked on my vehicle window and criticized me in front of my kids.

I have a longer list, I feel like I’m getting dumped on more than normal lately, from people who know me, and people who don’t, but I’ll leave it at this in order to make my point.

I have decided that I don’t have to be treated like that and just accept it. I can stand up for myself, and for my children. I can say “you’re wrong about me, and you’re out of line.” I’ve been doing that for the past month and I’ve discovered something about myself.

I don’t feel nice anymore.

I’m standing up to friends, family, strangers, anyone who attacks my character or abilities, and I’m defending myself. And the more I do it, the more bold I get.

To the woman who told me I had to move my van, I told her to back off, and who was she to tell me where I could park, the police? Did I take your spot, is that why you’re mad?

To the woman who swore at me at church, I turned around and said, “Are you kidding me? Grow up. Be quiet during the prayer, and don’t swear in church.”


To the woman who called me un-Christlike because of how I handled a situation where my son was being bullied and then assaulted, I told her to keep her eye on her own family and quit judging mine. Then I “un-friended” her on Facebook.

I still want to be a nice person. I don’t want to feel bitter, angry, or cynical all the time. I’m beginning to look for opportunities to put someone in their place, instead of looking for opportunities to lift someone up. I don’t like the transformation, but I’m also not ready to go back to laying down and taking it. I’m looking for balance.


How can you be strong and stand up for yourself without becoming hard?


I just want to be nice again.